I will expect blowjobs when I wake up at 4 am. Try not to take this personally. It’s just that that’s what doms are for.
You will probably find belts in weird, yet convenient, locations around the house: next to the kettle… hanging in the shower… draped over the front door. I definitely didn’t put them there. They clearly walked there themselves to demonstrate their sense of uselessness. It’s your job to help them feel useful again.
I will always be the dom of my bed, so if I give you an extra square centimetre, it will feel like a big step for me. Cherish these big steps. They’re what true submission is made of.
I often break out into song from my favourite childhood musicals because they’re a few of my favourite things. There is only one way to stop me, and it involves that belt that’s fortuitously dangling from the light fitting. I truly don’t know how it got there, though.
It’s not that you don’t matter. It’s just that I’m a crap sub.
Cleaning products make me go into anaphylaxis, but I’m willing to risk your cleaning the oven in my presence. My love is profound and generous.
If you count down from 10 for my orgasm, I will definitely start singing The Final Countdown by Europe. It’s a glitch I was born with. The only cure is that belt that’s conveniently buckled around your head. I have no idea how that happened either, though. I’m beginning to think the house is haunted.
To aid your lifelong journey of learning how to be a dom, I am willing to challenge your preconceived notions about which of us cooks dinner tonight.
My pants fell off? What an odd problem. Do you suppose it might be solved by using the belt that’s currently cable-tied to your beard?
I understand you have to do your taxes, send an email to your boss, and get ready for a meeting, but have you considered having a blowjob right now?
… maybe that belt tied around your penis should be included in this oral adventure. It clearly climbed up there for a reason.